22 Feb 2006
Yesterday, you was sleeping beside. Whenever I tried to hug you, you suddenly disappeared. I knew that, it just a dream... Since then, I miss you so much and yesterday was another sleepless night for me. I hoping you really can sleep beside me as a wife in the future. I really wish that...
Sigh.. I miss you so much! I can't SMS you and say that "I Miss You" because I know he is there and this will trouble your life so much. I just wish you can have a peaceful life. I always thought that, it is ok if only me the one who suffer rather than both of us suffer. I really can't resist myself from missing you, thinking of you and loving you... You're simply the special one in my life and without you in my life, everything is just meaningless... My mind kidda "messy" right now because I don't know what I should do now... I want to study for my final exam but it seem like "something" have distracted me and I know the "something" is You.. I keep thinking what you're doing and where you're going.. I worried about your safety, I worried about your time planning, I worried about your studies, and I worried everything about you...
21 Feb 2006
Happy Birthday to Myself ! Yeah! I got your wishes in the early morning. I'm very happy with your wishes even with picture message but I couldn't read it. But never mind, as long as you got the "heart" to message me, I'm very very happy de! No matter how many people gonna wish me, but you're the one I hope you'll wish to me because you really someone special to my life.
You make me worried again today. Your phone out of battery and the phone just switched off automatically. If your phone can ring, I'll not that worry, but this time, your phone was totally off! Can't called in! I can't sit properly and waiting for you to come. So I took an action! I drove out, find you along the way to the pier there. I search around UOB in case you're waiting for your mum. But unfortunately, I still can't found your car. So, I continue my driving again, then at last, I found you!!! Phew~ that time my heart like .... indescribable! I'm very happy and drive back home! Maybe you think I worried you too much and maybe you'll thought I'm so stupid. But actually it is not, is I really really worried bout you. Sit at home and wait also I'll worry, why don't I drive out and search! At least, I took an action where I feel much better... I love you Joe, I can't bear to lose someone special like you... Thanks God!
Really thanks for the dinner! Really thanks! I know the love is still exist in your heart. I know you still love me else you won't sacrifice for me! Then, you told me, you collecting money for my birthday present. I'm so touched! I knew that only the love still exist that can make you collect money to buy birthday present for me. So I believe you still love me! The love still exist in your heart... I love you Joe.. One day, I know you'll be back... Even the dinner is kidda rush, but I don't mind. Because I just wish to spend my birthday night with you! The best ever present you had gave me was all about tonight. You spent the time with me, you have the birthday's dinner with me, you sang birthday's song for me, and together we enjoyed the birthday's cake... Thanks Joe...
Wherever you go; whatever you do; whatever it takes or how my heart breaks, I will be right here waiting for you...
20 Feb 2006
Till today, most of my friends didn't know about our relationship. When people asked me, "where's your girlfriend?" I really don't know how to answer that time. I answered them "oh, she is studying right now". Is it because I still can't accept the fact that we're no longer a couple or Am I thinking that future you will be my girlfriend back? My feeling always told me that you will be be my girlfriend again in the future!
Just woke up from my nap, took not long, because I keep missing you. I worried when you SMS me, I couldn't reply and I worried when you call me, I couldn't answer. I want myself will always be there for you whenever you need...
I can't bear to lose you! I keep calling you, you didn't answer my calls. I message you, you didn't reply my messages... I'm so so worried about you just now.. really I thought something bad had happened on you *touch wood*! I scared he don't know how to take care and protect you... that's make me so worried of you.. I'm not that "pang sim" to let you alone when I'm away for studies... I hope you can take care of yourself very well and just be independent and no need to dependent on him! hehe..
Even the clock does not show 12.00a.m. but I really appreciated your wishes. I can't stop myself from crying after I listened to your birthday song. Thanks so much for tonight~! I hope my birthday wish will come true and I think you should know what is my birthday wish for this year. I wanna say that, since the day I met you, the wishes are always the same... I Love You!
Tonight definitely I will have a sweet sleep after listened to your sweet song. Missing you so much here and always remain the same that, I will be right here waiting for you to come back...
19 Feb 2006
The first thing I did when I open my eyes in the morning, I was missing you... everyday the same. I miss you so much! I see my handphone, is there any messages from you, but sadly, I don't received any SMS from you. I don't mind and I won't give up in chasing you back..
Again I cried today.. because I really miss you very very much! without you in my life, speechless.. just simply incomplete as what I can said. You are simply the answer to my incomplete life... Thanks for your best efforts as a girlfriend for these three years and I really appreciate it...
Wee~! I found the fate between us! Really ah.. Really unbelievable that I enroll business course in S.I.T !! LOL! God wanna us back again! God make S.I.T as a meeting place for both of us. God giving us the last chance dee.. If we still din appreciate this chance, I'm not sure God will help us again or not in the future.. But I knew one thing is, since the day we met, God already keep helping us, you think back and see. God really help us a lot and I should Thanks God!!! I hope we can appreciate this chance and use this chance wisely...
Oh yeah! today I felt very happy also because I can be a "stand-by donator". I knew that every single seconds, many people may hunger for our help. If I help them, perhaps, I might help someone who really needed or help someone from not losing a special one in their life. I knew the feeling of losing someone special because I'm experiencing right now. Losing you really make me go crazy and felt lost in life.
Miss you so much today till I cried... you're so meaningful to my life and everything seem meaningless after you leave me. I'll be waiting for you to come back and today I believe in fate strongly!
18 Feb 2006
Early morning I woke up and I'm still missing you here and still hope that you'll come back one day. Every night was a sleepless night for me. I felt that my life is simply incomplete and that make me can't have a good sleep. I miss where when you wake up, you will missed call me, then I will call you and ask, "baby, wake up de ah? baby, faster go to wash your face and take your breakfast la, if not later gastric ahh.." sigh... Now I can't make it where I so miss it... But one day, I believe I still can do the same thing...
I went to Pacific today with my parents. When I step into the mall, there I miss you so much! I started to think about our memories. We hold each others hands and shop around the mall.. Owh! Just a wonderful memories inside my mind.. I really wish again, I can hold your hands, shop together till legs break! LOL !!
I realized that I hate girls so much. When I see a girl, I will stare her back like wanna kill her! I lose the trust on girls and I hate them so much! Just except you... I don't know why I can't get angry with you and I don't hate you.. This show to myself that I really love you truly...
I have my dinner in Victoria Station tonight. After I have ordered the my meal and purposely ordered the "Red Grape Sparkling Juice, I started to miss you and at the same time, restaurant was playing a song, "baby, can I hold you tonight". That time I was like, "oh god! I know this will make me miss you even more". When the food was served, I was thinking, how nice you're just beside me so that I can share the food with you and I can feed you the food.. Owh~! I so miss the moments and that was so sweet...
I miss you so much and love you deeply.. I hope one day you'll be back to me again! We can start a new life and together once again we continue to create our new memories.
17 Feb 2006
I miss you so so much today. I woke up at 4.30a.m. and e-mail you at 4.45a.m. I got so many things to express so I just mail you what I want to tell you since not a good idea if I call you. And so sorry I have a dream where doesn't sound good to tell you but I need to tell you because you're my loved one and can't bear to see you get hurt in the future. I know that from day to day, my love to you is even deeper and deeper since the day you leave me...
I have make a decision where I choose to walk away from your life. I know this decision will be the best way and good for you, him and myself. But, leaving you will make my heart even hurt.
Again I have new decision where I choose to stay right beside you. LOL! This is also because I heard so many problem between you and him. The most funny thing is he do not dare to "eat" your saliva. ZzzZz ...
Miss you so much today till I cried... I'll be here waiting for you to come back!
16 Feb 2006
Today morning, received a SMS from you, said that the nick was not created by you! You said was created by Subang kia. That time when I was seeing your SMS, I was like in heaven. LOL! Then later on, received a very long SMS from you, you said "We'll be together in future" and "You're not getting married" These 2 sentences spice up my life! Thanks Joe!
Later when coming back from college, listening to this song, "The Chosen". Guess what? I'm singing this song with wide open smiling mouth, instead of crying. I felt very happy today! Every songs I listened to, I smile and my heart felt very sweet. Perhaps, I knew that you'll be mine in future!
Just finished conversation on the phone with you, I'm so happy that you still missing me even you have start a new relationship. Even though just a simple conversation, I felt very happy! Maybe this is the time where we can have a "LDR" test in between us. I knew that nothing can break us into two!
Wee~! Study so much, just wanna take a break. I always seeing the future. Today told you bout the pharmacy plan. Again was so happy when I imagining how nice we both together open the shop, take care of it, close the shop together and back home together. So sweet...
As usual, missing you always and right here waiting for you to come back...
15 Feb 2006
This is the day where you already start a new relationship with him. Even I wish you both to stay happy, but I can't lie to myself that I still loving you and can't bear to lose someone special like you in my life. Don't worry, as I really and truly wish you both the best! Because I don't want to see my loved one suffering. As long as you can find the right now, then I'll stay happy forever. When I saw your nick name in MSN, "a feel like heaven", I knew that he also can give you the happiness, care and love...
At the same time, when I saw the nick, I felt very hurt because it is unbelievable that in a short period of time, he can make you "a feel like heaven".
Missing you always and right here waiting for you to come back...